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The Empty Roles We Play

A three-part virtual discussion series led by Tonen O'Connor

Two sets of meeting times:
Wednesdays, 6:30 - 8 pm ET -- July 16, 23, & 30 --
REGISTRATION CLOSED
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Thursdays, 6:30 - 8 pm ET -- July 17, 24, & 31 -- REGISTRATION CLOSED
Zen practitioners are invited to join Tonen O'Connor, resident priest emerita of the Milwaukee Zen Center, for a series of three virtual discussions on the roles our self assumes as it faces life's changing nature. We will examine how society assigns roles to us and how our own choice of roles impacts our lives. We will consider the relationship of shikantaza, zazen without roles, to the roles we assume daily.

Registration is now closed for all sessions.
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Three virtual discussions

These will be open discussions to share responses to questions and reading material made available in advance of each session.  The readings will include varied selections from Zen and Western literature that are designed to encourage reflection. Okumura Roshi's e-book, The Structure of the Self in Mahayana Buddhism, will be a major resource throughout. If you plan to participate, please purchase and download your copy HERE, and engage with the text before the opening discussion so that everyone can begin with this common ground.

Tonen will make short introductory remarks and lead each discussion, but the intent is that everyone participates. A sense of humor will be welcome.
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Session 1. It begins with the self

We must know the nature of the self if we are to consider its roles. Who is it that plays a role? Is there a self behind the role playing? We will seek to understand the relationship between this "me" who plays many roles within daily life, and the self that is integral to the functioning of the entire universe.

Session 2. Roles born of society's expectations

From birth to death there is a vast collection of roles that society expects us to play: student, employee, lover, parent, friend, neighbor, teacher, to name but a few. We will look at the sources of these expectations and discuss the options we have in responding to them, as well as identifying the impact our chosen roles may have on others.

Session 3. Roles I identify as myself

Our minds create the sort of person we hope others will see, choosing to emphasize certain roles over others. These roles may represent aspirations, or they may be generated by circumstances. They reflect a self-view that influences our reaction to ever-changing life events. We will discuss whether our practice of shikantaza, where roles drop away, can help us respond to life's events without the distortion of self-assumed roles.
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About Tonen

Rev. Tonen O'Connor is the Resident Priest Emerita of the Milwaukee Zen Center. She was ordained by Tozen Akiyama and received dharma transmission from him in 1999, performing zuise at Eiheiji and Sojiji in 2000. Tonen trained at Shogoji and Hosshinji and holds the rank of ittokyoshi within the Sotoshu system as well as currently serving as kokusaifukyoshi. Resident Priest of the MZC from 2001-2011, her further engagement included an 8-year partnership with Zuiko Redding to lead the Great Sky sesshin at Hokyoji in Minnesota and 17 years of leading dharma groups within the Wisconsin state prison system.

For more about Tonen and her dharma career, visit our page on Tonen's Teachings.
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Considerations for participation

Please note that this series is offered online only, via Zoom. The discussions assume that participants have engaged with Shohaku Okumura's e-book, The Structure of the Self in Mahayana Buddhism, and are comfortable with the tasks outlined in the "Computer Skills Checklist" at right.
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If you have any further questions after reading the information on this page, please feel free to contact us.

Computer Skills Checklist

  • Sign into your Zoom account and join a meeting
  • Mute and unmute your microphone within Zoom
  • Bookmark and return to a web page
  • Download and print or retrieve documents attached via email
  • Adjust the volume of your computer speaker or headset
​If you are not comfortable with these activities, please get help from family or friends well before the discussion series begins.​​
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Registration is closed.

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  • Home
  • End of Year Appeal 2025
  • New to Sanshin?
  • Schedules and calendars
  • About Sanshin Zen Community
    • Ethics & conflict restorative policies
    • Zendo guidelines
  • FAQ
  • Resources for practice
  • Resources for small groups
    • 108 Gates SS
  • Sangha News
  • Sanshin network
  • Contact